Survogel Asks the Biosphere

 INTRO: I'm Pied, a pied urvogel, or an Archaeopteryx!  I'm Mr Bloomsip!  I'm Hibiscus!  We're sunbirds with LEGO bricks!  I use my other name for the title here!  Pied! Bloomsip! And Hibiscus! On  Survogel Asks the Biosphere!  NOTE: Each speaker has a font/emphasis modifier they talk in. A combination of multiple of these, like this , represents many speakers speaking together. As I can't combine fonts, imagine that bold speech is Sitaaren and Survogel speaking with everyone else.  Hello, readers. I come with some bad tidings. Double bad tidings. First, unlike what the intro says, Mr Bloomsip and Hibiscus are both on a vacation. I wholeheartedly support them going to sip blooms instead of yammering on about nature, which is tiring at times, but I'm not making this a one-avialan show, so I've called Ryba back on set. They also got a friend with them!  Nice to be back in your studio, Survogel! I see you've revamped it a bit! :D  Ehe...

NOTE: This is a fictional plotline. I'm not in anyone else's home in reality.  Hello, Mr Bloomsip! We're back on the air!  From our own studio, at last!  Shall we catch our listeners up on my misadventures?  Given it's been a month since our last post, yes.  The home I was in was somewhere in Pune, but where exactly? When let out of my cage, I managed to turn the child of the house into an avid Nerdfighter, and, with them being old enough, they were on An Abundance of Desis! From there, talking to Mr Bloomsip was significantly facilitated, after whatever was going on with the leg-bound device.  After accessing my parents, I defenestrated, turned human, and hid until they found me, and here I am, revelling in the 'Missing Bird' posters!  Ha-ha!  Wait, what's that noise in our studi- another sunbird?! Let's go see, Bloomsip!  Mmh... what is this place?  Readers, I'd like you to meet my very distant cousin sibling Hibiscus!  Wait, they...

NOTE: This is FICTION. But it has a lot of fact about the wildlife trade. Deepak Dalal, if you can read this, know you've inspired me to make this, senpai.  DAY 1:  Alright, I'm just preaching to the choir here, but I'm going to recap for our readers.  My dad (because I'm a human who transformed into this urvogel) drove us all this way. He was very onboard with this plan, because he said, and I quote, "She needs to be able to survive without us because we won't go with her to IISc or anywhere else". It was a dreary couple of hours, but at least I didn't have to comb my hair much. When we got there, I was yeeted towards the nearest tree, and then I made my best impression of a drongo, facilitated by my urvogel syrinx!  I'm just going to skip a lot of the stuff that happened, but long story short, there were poachers. And I'm now in a cage. This end of the call is in a truck, and it's a terrible place to be in. I want water, but nobody's ...

INTRO: I'm Pied, a pied urvogel, or an Archaeopteryx!  I'm Mr Bloomsip, purple sunbird who owns two blue LEGO bricks!  I use my alias for the title here!  We're Pied- and Bloomsip- h osts of  Survogel asks the Biosphere!  NOTE: This is merely a fictional narrative of events. Don't take it to be a real thing. I'm not risking my life IRL, because of the fact that I have a future worth turning into a present.  Alright, are we live yet?  Yes.  Good. *inhales* Okay, so... I've got a proposition. I'm going to get into the wildlife trade and survive for as long as I can. If it seems I'm not going to survive, then only will I call the cops. I'm going to pose as a weird drongo thing that can talk, DEFINITELY get captured alive due to the fact that I can talk, do a Shawshank-redemption Papillon by freeing as many birds as I can without getting caught, and see where I end up, which I hope to Frog Titan isn't "stuffed in a museum in Germany".  I w...

NOTE: Canonically, this short story is an excerpt from an interview with a surprisingly disgruntled Tyrannosaurus whose story nobody believes. Grab a snack and enjoy.  Where am I? No clue. How’d I get here? I only have a vague idea. What are my chances of getting free? Zero. So, what do I know? I’m now in a place with alien plants, as hot as my old home, and being fed alien animals by aliens. The place I am trapped in is surrounded by alien grey structures that make lightning. There’s also some more alien grey stuff, that looks more like rocks, that surrounds the alien grey lightning structures. On the other side, beyond more lightning structures, are animals I actually know. So far, I’m the only one in here, and my prison is surrounded by an excited crowd of the aliens that abducted me. This place, though, seems a lot easier to live in than my old home. It’s lonely, but food, water, heat, and healing aliens are provided. But nah, there were healers of my own kind back ho...