Cancelling Deepak Dalal

 INTRO: I'm Pied, a pied urvogel, or an Archaeopteryx! 

I'm Mr Bloomsip! 

I'm Hibiscus! 

We're sunbirds with LEGO bricks! 

I use my other name for the title here! 

Pied! Bloomsip! And Hibiscus! On 

Survogel Asks the Biosphere! 


NOTE: Each speaker has a font/emphasis modifier they talk in. A combination of multiple of these, like this, represents many speakers speaking together. As I can't combine fonts, imagine that bold speech is Sitaaren and Survogel speaking with everyone else. 


Hello, readers. I come with some bad tidings. Double bad tidings. First, unlike what the intro says, Mr Bloomsip and Hibiscus are both on a vacation. I wholeheartedly support them going to sip blooms instead of yammering on about nature, which is tiring at times, but I'm not making this a one-avialan show, so I've called Ryba back on set. They also got a friend with them! 

Nice to be back in your studio, Survogel! I see you've revamped it a bit! :D 

Eheh. Same Ryba from December, pronouncing emoticons as words, like I do, but only in my head. And I would like to welcome a new guest! 

I'm Needley, an Asian openbill stork. I'm new here, so can you catch me up on what's going on? 

Well, we're a blog-cum-podcast who interview life-forms in our studio. So far, we've debated with Mr Bloomsip, this shiny little bird in the photo which our listeners can't see, about Diwali, brought Ryba and a few other birds in to talk about migration over bird-friendly hot cocoa, and then gone on a suicide mission which didn't kill me as a bird in the wildlife trade, despite me not being a bird. Then we were joined by our third host, Hibiscus. They look like this in the photo which our listeners can't see, but I've also attached it in the last episode. 

Whoa! Confusing! 

I know, and today we're reviewing a book called The Golden Eagle. It's part of the Feather Tales series by Deepak Dala- 

*screaming* Was this the speciesist book you made us read?! 

Yes, sadly. That's the second bad tidin- 

THIS IS VERY OFFENSIVE! 

AS IN, WHO MADE THE STORKS INTO STALINISTS?! 

AND US, THE OSPREYS, INTO KGB?! 

*more stork screaming* 

I mean, he's spreading hate against storks! You guys have nice proportions! Though I sometimes have the urge to put a rope through your beak, you're valid, Needley! 

I'm volatile right now, so do NOT. 

Understandable, have a nice day. 

ALSO, SHOULD I GIVE AN ANONYMOUS TIP TO THE HARGILLA ARMY THAT DEEPAK DEALINGSTORKHATE IS HOLDING HARGILLA CHICKS HOSTAGE?! 

Hey, at least Chorus the blue whistling thrush- 

THEY DID GREEN PIGEONS DIRTY! 

They did! D:< 

Now look who's pronouncing emoticons! 

Not now, Ryba! I'm connecting Sitaaren, my blue whistling-thrush friend, on voice chat. 

Wait, you're getting a whistling-thrush on the line? 

Hello, Sitaaren, it's me, Pied. 

Oh, hey! Been a while since we last met each other. What do you want me to do? 

You know that book that Deepak Dalal wrote? 

Do you have the slightest idea how little that narrows it down? 

The one with a bird whose name sounds like the old username of that cyborg. 

Oh, right. That one. Well... storks are pretty beautiful. The El Mafioso Master? His kind's extremely sleek, and me likey! 

I somewhat agree, and even those who society don't consider beautiful... they're still pretty pog. 

I'm pretty sure this is for your podcast, so can I say a message? 

Yes. I actually... *typing noises* had one scripted, so read the latest message in the associated text channel. 

Well, are you going to give a count for when we say it together? 

You're on IST, so the moment the clock strikes 18:50, we say it together. Okay? 

Okay! 

Okay! 

Three, two, one. 

Deepak Dalal's spreading stork hate. Don't buy this book and the pain you will abate! 



P.S. 

I bought this book around late March, and somewhat enjoyed it, as it's set near Lonar crater and gives Shikar a bit of an origin story, but Deepak Dalal did insult Asian openbills beyond forgiveness, hence this diss post. I'm already working on a diss track for Odalia Blight! Don't make me have to do one for him! 

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